“God as
We Understood Him”:
But, as my period of sobriety moved
forward, and my continued need for God’s help increased by leaps and bounds, I
determined that there was no common agreement in the A.A rooms where I was
going daily about this God “as we understood Him” or this “higher power.” There
clearly was no consensus as to “who” or “what” this so-called “higher power”
was. In fact, many an older member has simply said in my presence that he
couldn’t and didn’t need to understand “it.” Rather, he just needed to keep his
“program” very very simple. All one had to keep in mind, these members
proclaimed, was: “Just don’t drink. And go to meetings.” I have had no trouble
following that advice for years. But as one writer said, “Drinking’s not the
problem.” And I realized these keep-it-simple guys had rarely advanced to any
understanding of God. Certainly not that they would admit to. Almost none had
read the Bible, gone to any church, or developed any interest whatever in “religion.”
They bragged about A.A.’s being “spiritual, but not religious;” even though few
had the slightest idea what that meant.
Shoemaker had been a vibrant
leader of “A First Century Christian Fellowship” (later also known as “the Oxford
Group”) in America. He had long been a friend and supporter of Lutheran
minister Dr. Frank N. D. Buchman who had founded “A First Century Christian
Fellowship” in the autumn of 1922. Shoemaker even provided housing for the
virtual American headquarters of the Oxford Group in Calvary House, next to his
Calvary Church in New York. He allowed Dr. Buchman to live there when he was in
the New York area. And Shoemaker wrote dozens of Oxford Group books, pamphlets,
and articles until he split with its founder in 1941.
The Compromise That
Opened the A.A. Doors
By Dick B.
© 2015 Anonymous. All
rights reserved
My Own Experience
At my first A.A. meeting, I was
delighted. Friendliness, laughter, concern, suggestions. All came pouring
toward me at the “Wednesday Night What It’s Like Now" meeting –later to
become my Home Group. At my second meeting, I made a speech about needing help
with a pending court appearance. And a non-attorney offered to come with me; he
said he had studied law in Brazil. By my third meeting, I was beginning to
detox heavily. Yet I didn’t know what detoxing was, what was happening, or that
I was becoming really sick. They told me to use orange juice and honey. I
searched high and low for honey, bought a bag of oranges, put them in the
microwave, and never saw them again. But I made another speech. This time, I
stood at the door of the “Friday Night Beginners’ Meeting," announced that
I had been very frightened, said I had seen “God as we understood Him" on
the wall, had prayed to God as I did understand Him, and had really found
peace, for that night at least. Unquestionably, however, I was a little crazy—as
only A.A. newcomers can be. A few days later, I had three grand mal seizures—the
first one at a meeting during which I almost bit my tongue in half. I was
trundled off in an ambulance to the Emergency Room and then Intensive Care. In
a day or two, I checked in to a treatment center. But that’s another story. The
point here is that I stuck, and have stuck, with A.A. I believed I could and
would receive help because A.A. had seemed to recommend entrusting my life to
the care of God as I understood Him. I’ve since found out that thousands have
done the same thing in the more than 79 years since A.A.’s founding in June
1935. They, like myself, have received help. Some are simply “dry”—still suffering
from “untreated alcoholism.” Some say they are “in recovery.” Some of us say I’ve
“recovered.” Some of us—just as cofounders Bill W. and Dr. Bob, and “Alcoholic
Anonymous Number Three” (Akron attorney Bill D.) said—say we have been “cured.”
Some of us, who are believers, are very clear that we have been delivered by
the power of God.
So, Was A.A. about God “as we understood Him”?
It didn’t take very long for me
to get an answer to that question. Of course it wasn’t! And how did I find out.
Well, I’ve already covered the myriad of “higher power” and “power greater than
ourselves” phrases that were floating around the rooms and in recent 12 Step
literature. But no rational person could say these have anything whatever to do
with our Creator. These “powers” seemed to mean just about anything to the
confused crowd with which I hung out. Whether new-found A.A. friends had been
lawyers like myself, painters like my first sponsor, warehousemen like his
sponsor, teachers like my roommate, or “consultants” (a handy A.A. word for
unemployed, devastated, newcomers), all had different ideas about this “power
greater than themselves.”
My first sponsor did occasionally
talk about God. His sponsor talked about a “higher power.” My roommate talked
about witchcraft. Others talked about a “rock,” a “Big Dipper,” and a “Group of
Drunks” as their “higher power.” Some even offered to “loan” out their own “higher
power” until the newer person could find his own. Which, they said, could be
anything greater than himself. One authoritative-sounding fellow assured those
present at almost any and every Friday Night Beginners’ Meeting that his “higher
power” was Ralph. Somehow, I was able to resist buying in to that one. However,
his name for “a” god still rings loudly in my ears.
Where Did This Modifying Phrase “as
we understood Him” Originate?
I won’t quote or cite the
circulating accounts about where this phrase “as we understood Him” came from which was used in Steps Three and
Eleven as a modifier of the word “God.” Many are wrong. Most are conflicting.
In fact, until my research was under way, I had found no one who had even
mentioned this modifying phrase in the same breath with A.A. The story tellers
had simply ignored the very probable, real source—the Reverend Samuel Moor
Shoemaker, Jr., Rector of Calvary Episcopal Church in New York.
Actually, one can find many words
and phrases in Sam Shoemaker’s books that seem to have been incorporated almost
verbatim in Bill W.’s Big Book, talks, and writings. Bill often sang the
praises of Reverend Shoemaker, dubbed Sam a “co-founder” of A.A., said Sam had
been a wellspring of its ideas, exchanged lots of correspondence with Sam, and
had him speak at two A.A. International Conventions—St. Louis in 1955 and Long
Beach in 1960. Sam was also invited to, and did, write several articles for
A.A.’s “house organ,” the A.A. Grapevine.
Bill had many a talk with Sam Shoemaker before he (Bill) drafted A.A.’s basic
text. Bill submitted a draft manuscript to Shoemaker for review prior to the
book’s publication in April 1939. And Bill had asked Sam Shoemaker to write the
Twelve Steps. Shoemaker, however, had declined—saying the Steps should be
written by an alcoholic, namely, Bill.
Rev. Shoemaker was the closest
thing to a spiritual mentor that Bill W. had, prior to his completion and
publication of A.A.’s Big Book in the spring of 1939. Bill had not actively
participated in a church since early adulthood. [He had participated in Sunday
school at East Dorset Congregational Church while he was growing up. (Bill may
have also attended Sunday school at the Congregational Church in Rutland, but I
have not been able to confirm that as yet). He had also participated in events
at the First Congregational Church in Manchester (required by Burr and Burton
Seminary) and services at a local church of his choice on Sundays in
Northfield, Vermont (required by Norwich University).] Bill had become, in his
own words, “a conservative atheist.” Bill’s wife Lois, as well as A.A.’s first
archivist Ruth Hock, reported that Bill had read practically no religious
literature. Bill himself said he “hadn't looked in the Bible” until he moved in
with Dr. Bob and Anne Smith in the summer of 1935—the period when A.A. was
founded, and when Bill and Bob had had nightly discussions of its principles
and practices. The foregoing claims are clearly wrong, but have persisted.
The foregoing facts about Bill,
A.A., and Sam Shoemaker can be found specifically documented in a number of
writings. I have covered them all in my book, New Light on Alcoholism: God, Sam Shoemaker, and A.A., 2d ed. (http://www.dickb.com/newlight.shtml).
I’ve also covered them in my books about the Oxford Group and Sam
Shoemaker: See Dick B., The Oxford Group and Alcoholics Anonymous: A
Design for Living That Works, 2d ed. (http://www.dickb.com/Oxford.shtml)
and Dick B., Good Morning!: Quiet Time,
Morning Watch, Meditation, and A.A. (http://www.dickb.com/goodmorn.shtml).
I’ve also discussed them in Bill Pittman and Dick B., Courage to Change; and in Dick B., The Akron Genesis of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2d ed. (http://www.dickb.com/Akron.shtml).
Bill himself made scattered references to the Book of James; Jesus’s Sermon on
the Mount; 1 Corinthians 13; as well as to God as “Creator,” “Maker,” “Father,”
“Father of Light,” and “God of our fathers” in various places in A.A. General
Service Conference-approved or A.A. Grapevine publications such as Alcoholics Anonymous Comes of Age, The Language of the Heart, ‘Pass It On,’ and Alcoholics Anonymous, and the Best
of the Grapevine volumes.
Specific Examples in Shoemaker’s Writings of the “God as we understand
Him” Idea
Surrender to God
Sam wrote much about the importance of surrender—surrender to
God! Among his papers at the Episcopal Church Archives in Austin, Texas, I
found the following:
There was nothing actually new to be learned from the
experience when related. “I just gave my life over to God” or “I surrender to
Christ.” [Dick B., New Light on
Alcoholism, 2d ed., 92; (http://www.dickb.com/newlight.shtml)].
Other Examples of
Sam’s Surrender Language
Except a man be born again, he
cannot see the kingdom of God. . . . A man is born again when the control of
his life, its center and its direction pass from himself to God (Shoemaker, National Awakening, 57).
One may say that the whole
development of Christianity in inwardness has consisted in little more than the
greater and greater emphasis attached to this crisis of self-surrender
(Shoemaker, Realizing Religion, 30).
Surrender is not conversion, we
cannot convert ourselves; but it is the first step in the process (Shoemaker, Confident Faith, 41).
Sam on the Act of
Surrender—a Decision
Decision. . . . We must help people
to make an act of self-surrender to Christ, which renounces all known sins,
accepts Him as Saviour, and begins Christian life in earnest (Shoemaker, The Church Alive, 41).
He went into his room, knelt by his
bed, and gave his life in surrender to God (Shoemaker, Children of the Second Birth, 175).
She surrendered to God her groundless
fears, and with them turned over her life for His direction (Shoemaker, Children of the Second Birth, 82).
That night I decided to “launch out
into the deep:” and with the decision to cast my will and my life on God, there
came an indescribable sense of relief, of burdens dropping away (Shoemaker, Twice-Born Ministers, 134).
And Then, Surrender as
Much of Yourself as You Can
to as Much of God as
You Understand
So they prayed together, opening
their minds to as much of God as he understood. . . (Shoemaker, Children of the Second Birth, 47).
So he said that he would “surrender
as much of himself as he could, to as much of Christ as he understood” (Shoemaker,
Children of the Second Birth, 25. See
also, and compare “In Memoriam” Princeton, The Graduate Council, June 10, 1956,
2-3; and Shoemaker, How to Become a
Christian, 72).
The finding of God, moreover, is a
progressive discovery; and there is so much more for all of us to learn about
him. (Shoemaker, How to Find God, 1).
Begin honestly where you are.
Horace Bushnell once said, “Pray to the dim God, confessing the dimness for
honesty’s sake.” I was with a man who prayed his first real prayer in these
words: “O God, if there be a God, help me now because I need it.” God sent him
help. He found faith. He found God. . . God will come through to you and make
Himself known. (Shoemaker, How to Find
God, 6). [See and compare: Alcoholics
Anonymous, 3rd ed., 37: “But He has come to all who have honestly sought
Him. When we drew near to Him, He disclosed Himself to us!” See also the Bible
book so popular with the pioneers—James: “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw
nigh to you.” James 4:8 (KJV).]
[A]ny honest person can begin the
spiritual experiment by surrendering “as much of himself as he can, to as much
of Christ as he understands” (Shoemaker, Extraordinary
Living for Ordinary Men, 76).
There was no talk at all about surrendering to as much of “Ralph”
or to as much of “a lightbulb” or to as much of “a tree” as you understand!
A.A.’s Big Book implored: May you find God—and not just some A.A. group! Groups
are found in meeting schedules, not the Bible.
Said Sam in substance: You simply start where you are in
your understanding. You surrender as much of yourself as you can. To as much of
God as you understand. Then, added Sam, God will come through to you, make
Himself known, and enable you to understand more. You will come to believe. You
will find God, said Sam. God will make Himself known. God will not be making Himself
known “a rock,” “a tree,” “a coke bottle,” or “a radiator.” He will make known
Himself—God, our Creator!
Similar Ideas and Words in Other Oxford Group Writings
Stephen Foot was one of the most
popular Oxford Group writers of the early 1930's. Foot used a slightly
different form of expression. It presented the same idea of initial, limited
understanding. It spoke instead of initial, limited knowledge of God
(surrendering all that you know of self to all that you know of God). Foot’s
language was also used by Dr. Bob’s wife Anne in her personal journal, and by
long-time Oxford Group activist James D. Newton in his biographical Uncommon Friends title. These stalwart
Oxford Group admirers were also readers of, and thoroughly acquainted with, the
works of Rev. Sam Shoemaker. Respectively, they wrote:
Life began for me with a surrender
of all that I know of self to all that I knew of God (Foot, Life Began Yesterday, 12-13. See also
James D. Newton, Uncommon Friends,
154).
Are you prepared to do his will,
let the cost be what it may? That is surrender of all one knows of self to all
one knows of God. (Foot, Life Began
Yesterday, 175).
[In her journal, Dr. Bob’s wife
Anne Smith twice wrote the following idea:] “Try to bring a person to a
decision to ‘surrender as much of himself as he knows to as much of God as he
knows.’ Stay with him until he makes a decision and says it aloud.” (Dick B., Anne Smith’s Journal, 1933-1939, 3rd ed.,
25, 97: http://www.dickb.com/annesm.shtml).
Look at What Bill W. Said before the “Atheism” Compromise
Before he compromised and allowed the replacement of the
word “God” with the phrase “a Power greater than ourselves” in Step Two, and the
modification of the word “God” in Steps Three and Eleven by addition of the
phrase “as we understood Him” following it in Steps Three and Eleven, Bill was
telling a far different, far more accurate, and far more consistent story in
terms of what he had learned from his sponsor Ebby T., from Dr. Bob’s wife Anne
and her personal journal, and from Shoemaker and Oxford Group writings and
talks. Bill wrote:
This is what my
friend [Ebby T.] suggested I do: Turn my face to God as I understand Him and
say to Him with earnestness—complete honesty and abandon—that I henceforth
place my life at His disposal and Direction forever. [“Bill Wilson’s Original
Story,” a 34-page document I found at Bill’s home at Stepping Stones, page 30,
lines 989-992].
[Ebby T. said to
Bill:] So, call on God as you understand God. Try prayer. [W.W., “The Fellowship
of Alcoholics Anonymous,” in Quarterly
Journal of Studies on Alcohol. Yale University, 1945, 463.]
[Reciting in
A.A.’s own basic text, precisely how he had followed Ebby T.’s instructions,
Bill wrote:] There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to
do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and
direction. [Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd
ed., 13.]
Bill did not turn his face to, or
call on, or humbly offer himself to, “a radiator,” “a tree,” “a light bulb,” a “Group
of Drunks,” or any other blatantly-idolatrous symbol. He turned to God as he
(Bill W,) did then and there understand God. That is a piece of ignored A.A.
history that should be emblazoned on the desk of everyone who tries to sell
snake oil to an unwary A.A. newcomer.
Using language very similar to that used by Sam Shoemaker in
his book Confident Faith, Bill wrote
quite eloquently:
When we became
alcoholics crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we
had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He
is nothing. God either is, or He isn’t. What was our choice to be? [Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd ed., 53. And
see: (1) Hebrews 11:6b (KJV): “. . . [H]e that cometh to God must believe that
he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him; and (2) Shoemaker,
Confident Faith, 20-21: God is, or He
isn’t. You leap one way or the other.]
Bill did not assert that “a
radiator” either is or it isn’t. He did not claim that “a lightbulb” either is
or it isn’t. He didn’t declare that “Santa Claus” either is or he isn’t.
Consistent with the words of Hebrews 11:6 in the Bible, and the reasoning of
his friend Sam Shoemaker, Bill W. made the very simple and rational statement
that God either is, or He isn’t. Then, following the instructions of the Oxford
Group, Shoemaker, and his friend Ebby T., Bill W. “surrendered as much of
himself as he understood to as much of God as he (Bill) then understood.”
Start with Shoemaker, the Oxford Group, and Dr. Bob’s Wife
That’s it, folks. The story of
how the “God as we understood Him” language
came to be inserted in the Big Book and its Twelve Steps seems to have been
much distorted by the claim of an A.A. old-timer Jim B. that he (Jim) was
responsible for this modifying phrase “as
we understood Him.” We thoroughly explored that claim, just as far as we
were able; and we found that Bill W. had never acknowledged Jim’s claim. As we
researched Shoemaker’s writings, Oxford Group books, and Anne Smith’s personal journal,
we saw a far different history that suggested a far different origin of the
phrase. For one thing, we saw that Jim B. had not been sober until long after
Stephen Foot, Sam Shoemaker, Jim Newton, and Anne Smith had tendered the
commonly-used expression that you surrender to as much of God as you
understand! (See Dick B., Turning Point,
172-181: http://www.dickb.com/Turning.shtml;
and Dick B., Anne Smith’s Journal, 1933-1939,
3rd ed., 26, n.10: http://www.dickb.com/annesm.shtml).
Don’t start with an avowed atheist (Jim B.) who apparently was neither sober
nor present when the phrase “as we
understood Him” was suggested and substituted in Step Three and Step
Eleven. Start instead with the Bible students (Sam Shoemaker and Dr. Bob’s wife
Anne) who were close to Bill W. in the pre-publication years and who had been expressing,
for beginners, this idea years before A.A.’s Big Book was first published. They
had an understanding of God. They felt others could gain an understanding and
knowledge by starting with whatever understanding they had at the time of their
“surrender” to God. Quite clearly, Bill and his friends were talking about the
Creator as He is described in Genesis—the God they understood.
Gloria
Deo
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